The "281".
You go out to a club thinking you are definitely an 8, perhaps a close 10 with your new black stretch pants, oversized "benetton" sweater, and ankle boots (circa 1984). And he is styling in his new "structure" vest, 501 levis and black reebok hightops (once again, 1984).
You take one look and give him a high 2.
After slamming shots with your sisters, brothers, best friends, second best friends, runner ups, and acquaintances... you take another look at "him" and he is closing in on a high 8.
And then...
after a few sloppy dog kisses that sober you up -- instantly -- like a pot of black coffee,
Oh, shit!
He's a total ONE!
OMG, did anybody just see me swapping spit with that dude?
AND more importantly "WHERE did all the Benettons in America go?"
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