in my opinion...

I have a GREAT IDEA !

I was visiting my dentist, not really visiting, but attending an appointment for cleaning.  I inherited my husband's dentist when we married... and I really feel at home in the office. 

I arrive early for the coffee and cookies. 

I stay late to socialize with the hygenists.

And that is when it hit me!  My brilliant idea!

"Dr. M, I think hiring an aesthetician would be a fantastic business move,"  I proposed.

"What?"

"Well, I feel that your business would multiply with more female patients.  Because you can only sell whitening trays once.  That is the real cost and the gel is negligible.  What you need is more frequent appointments and visits from type-A moms like me."

"I don't understand."

"Hiring an aesthetician to perform beauty treatments is what this office needs.  You buy the meds.  And the tech 'installs' them."

Silence ...

"You see, I NEED BOTOX!  BOTOX, do you hear what I am saying???  BOTOX!  I can HIDE the purchase of Botox from my husband IF you sell it here.  Husband would not think twice about a charge at XYZ DENTAL but he would question my outrageous charge at ABC MEDSPA.  Husband would just think that all that diet coke has finally rotted my teeth and a couple of root canals are happening."  

Continued silence (somehow I don't think that is a good sign)...

I continue, "BOTOX while we wait.  A little teeth cleaning, a little plaque removal, and a little wrinkle filler.  It's a total Win-Win.  Well, for me anyway."

Dr. M never did respond.  But since I visit in 178 more days... I will just suggest my brilliant idea again and again... until he suggests that I transfer to a new dentist. 

What I have learned about Botox:

It is sold by the unit.  A unit.  I am not quite sure how much a unit is but I am gambling that it is just one of those itsy bitsy teeny tiny lines on an injection syringe. 

A decent price is $10/unit.

A common price is $15/unit.

So, I called ABC Medspa and I asked.  Yes, I did.  I just want to become educated in the line of anti-aging beauty treatments.  Not that I would ever have a self-elected injection but it is nice to be able to chat about it with all the other liposucked, tummytucked, botoxed mommies. 

Let's start with the forehead using the decent on-sale price.  The entire wrinkly forehead takes 40 units to fill.  $400 to freeze the forehead and keep your eyebrows from lifting!  Wow!

The eyes.  Crowsfeet or laugh lines.  Whatever name you would like to label those wrinkles.  One eyes takes 20 units.  Do the math:  $200. 

The good news is that I can afford one eye.  How odd would I look walking around with one perfectly filled eye and one perfectly wrinkled eye?   A perfect pirate.  Or a perfect permanent wink!

I forgot to ask the most important question:  how long does the injection last?  Forever is a very good wish. 

May your days too be filled with thoughts of botox.  And your wrinkles be less noticeable.

beauty has a price

AND, beauty definitely has an element of PAIN.

Botox, Restylane, Face lift, Lipo, SmartLipo, Abdominoplasty (Tummy and mini-tummy tuck), Breast implants, Breast reduction, Breast lift, Butt lift, Butt implants, Cheek implants, Rhinoplasty (nose), Blepharoplasty (eyelids), and the list goes on.

I have friends that began Botox and/or Restylane Injections when they celebrated their 3oth birthday. But, my question is... what happens when they turn 40? Will the need (not desire) for cosmetic surgery accelerate to a face lift at 40? or 50? For example, because the 30 year old decided to accelerate the 'anti-aging' process, will she desperately need a face lift? Will her face be 'older' than the average 40 year old because she chose injections over hydrating creams and SPF sunscreens?

I am definitely a plastic-surgery virgin... but there are a lot of women (18 and up) who have had more surgeries than I have had boyfriends. Breast implants are quite popular among the high school crowd. Boyfriends, Drinking and Boobs before college! Oh My!

The mommy mafia majority have all had Abdominoplasty! (Because they all got their boobs at 18, tummy tucks are IN for the thirtysomethings!) And for my age group, the fortysomethings, ANY and ALL plastic surgery is IN!

The thought of elected surgeries fill my senses with extreme pain. But... is it something I could consider, with highly effective post-operative pain MEDS?

MAYBE. MAYBE NOT.

PROBABLY NOT.

Considering my eyes well with tears at the "India Salon" - the new place in town to get beautifully arched eyebrows, I think elective, plastic, painful surgery is NOT in my future.

Eyebrow threading.

My four year old daughter innocently questions, "It is just string, how bad can that hurt?" IT hurts like HELL.