Trial Thanksgiving Run

Turkeys are not my "thing" in cooking

They appear to be easy to cook

They appear to be low maintenance

But first, you have to clean out all that shit inside them

You have all seen your mothers do it

They reach inside and pull that crap out

Personally, after being an eyewitness

Thanksgiving Turkey Dinner is RUINED for me

My darling husband loves turkey

And after our First Thanksgiving together

in which I managed to turn into a BBQ

He is now the man in charge of cooking the turkey

On that lovely First Thanksgiving together

I pretended that I already cleaned out the turkey's innards

So I left it in

I couldn't bear to ruin his Thanksgiving too

Well I did anyway

When the fire department sent truck number 26

My mother never told me that innards could cause a fire

A big Fire in old appliances

We remodeled the kitchen during the Christmas holidays!

Is It Evil or Lucky?

I suppose the "eye" depends on whether your glass is either half-full or half-empty?

Perhaps, if you are a half-empty kind of person, then it is the "eye" to ward off evil. And, if you are a half-full kind of annoying person, then it is the "eye" to bring good luck.

Actually, in a completely arrogant kind of way, I will take the FULL glass and use my "EYE" to ward off evil and bring good luck! It's a total win-win! It's so "Heads I Win, Tails You Lose"!

And that is why I am adorned in "eyes" ... in my ears, on my wrists, around my neck, and a secret one tucked away in my {guess?}. Here's to the EYE of Turkiye!

Hot Dog!

It's a pig! It's a pet! IT'S ... a real cooked hot dog! AND I survived Vietnam on "HUDA" beer.

My claim to fame: I have never eaten a hotdog... the All-American kind or otherwise. I despise the looks of them. I hate the name of them. I detest the shape of them. The idea of eating a flesh popcicle is revolting. Forget about what they are made out of - fillers. What are fillers? Intestines? Gizzards? Cartilage? The shit you find in the insides of a turkey at Thanksgiving? UGH.

Needless to say, I am not a healthnut freak. I don't count fat grams. I ignore the idea of heart killing trans fats. It's not just because I don't know how to cook a hotdog. It's just I don't and won't eat hotdogs. NEVER. EVER.