Happy BOO-Day!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!
IT'S THE FABULOUSLY FUN DAY OF TRICK OR TREATING!

I hope everyone has a fun-filled day and evening basking in Halloween traditions and decorations!

I just have to share these fabulous ideas for simple decor:
Pennants! 
Love them.
My family makes banners/pennants for every occasion:  birthdays, holidays, just-because days, pink days, blue days, summer days, etc.

This "Trick or Treat" pennant can be found at http://www.findingmyaloha.com/  It's printable.  So make yours today!  There's still time! 

Or perhaps this great banner?!  Find it at http://www.findingmyaloha.com/

I have to admit I had never heard of this holiday tradition before this year. 

So we added this neighborhood fun to our October calendar.

We booed!

We got booed!

O' how fun!

Put it on your calendar for next year! 

http://www.beenbooed.com/

for printable letters and ideas!!

**your neighbors will appreciate "You've Been Booed"

so much more than the old fashioned "Ding Dong Ditch"!

BOO! 

where's the beef?

OK.  C.  this one is for you.  I am back from my mental vacation... although I am officially on vacation.  Well, the children are anyway.  And since they are on summer vacation, I think I will revert back to my early years and think of myself as on vacation too. 

No dinners, lunches, or breakfasts.  Well, on a schedule anyway.  We are going to be so far off schedule.  Mainly due to the fact that I am being detained for being a smartass.

One of my favorite parts about growing up ... other than daydreaming I was an only child ...  was the visitation rites to military bases/facilities.  So, now that I am considered a non-dependent, the only way I can visit a military base/facility is to attend with my parents.  I cannot believe the military has cut me off!!! 

Recently, I had the opportunity to visit a base.  Name of base is unknown due to security reasons.  And my name.

 I arrived with a very eager- to- follow- the- directions attitude.  No misinformation.  I was trying to be serious... as in NOT using the B-word (bomb) at an airport even if you are just totally joking around.  Because as I have been warned THAT is NOT a joke, AT ALL!!

Military person:  "May I see your ID?"
Me:  "Yes".
Me:  "Here it is". 
Military person:  takes ID and appears to be studying it a bit too closely.  "HMMMMM."
Me:  "I am definitely over 21"
Military person:  "I AM NOT CHECKING YOUR AGE."

And so that is how I ended up in "detainment".

 I suggest not joking with anyone who has the authority to screw your day over.

the bunny was here

1.  Create with eggstra eggs

2.  Attend one or more egg hunts.

3.  Check out the egg loot.

And ... wear Easter dresses.

spring break or bust!

No bar too far ... (exactly 15 feet to the refrigerator door)
We drink to sink ... (44 ounces should do it)
What happens in _____, stays in _____ (the residence of choice)
We got beer, it's time to cheer!

Well my spring break has sprung.  Time to begin.  Time to relish.  Wahoo!
I am on my own.
The children have returned to their classrooms for the remaining nine weeks of school. 
The husband has returned to his office and/or the friendly skies.
The pets have returned to their outdoor play yard.

The mommy has returned to the sofa, feet up, diet coke in left hand, remote in right hand, cell phone off, computer on sleep mode, and home phone off the hook. 

It's Spring Break.
My Personal Spring Break.  (Not to be confused with a "personal summer")

The reason for my temporary hiatus:  the family was on spring break and then the vacation was extended due to illnesses.  So now that the home has returned to normal (not to be confused with the normally strewed shit spewing from every crevice) peace and quiet. 

Ahhhhh....

Just for a moment....

I can meditate with both eyes shut.

so many celebrations,

so little time...

2 March -- Dr. Seuss's Birthday

8 March -- Mardi Gras

9 March -- Ash Wednesday

11 March -- Ellis Island Day (in our house)

13 March -- Day Light Savings

17 March -- Saint Patrick's Day

20 March -- First Day of Spring

26 March -- Last Quarter Moon

30 March -- First Reconciliation

I totally overdid the whole Dr. Seuss day...  a fun, surprise lunch packed for school:

Green Eggs and Ham  (green hardboiled eggs and ham slices)

Pink Ink  (strawberry yogurt drink)

Blue Goo (blue jello)

Red Fish, Blue Fish (goldfish crackers)

The Cat in the Hat's Hat (strawberry/dip layered to resemble a hat)

So... now what am I going to do for all the other "fun" days this month?

I learned my lesson.  Start out with NOTHING... and then there are ZERO expectations. 

That's Right, Readers!  ZERO expectations! 

Would you know your child?

If your child's face was distortly displayed on an xray screen, would you know your child?

Weather Whiplash

Everyone in the world is experiencing this winter's weather whiplash. 

54 degrees. 
-10 degrees. 
Ice. 
Sleet. 
Snow. 
36 degrees. 
65 degrees. 
28 degrees
Sun.
77 degrees.

All I know is ... is that I have taken up listening (really listening, not just a head nod) to the weather for "how to dress for the day" cues.  Because, frequently (translates into daily), I do not dress appropriately for the weather.  Tank tops for 32 degrees -- thinking the day will warm up AND it never does.  Sweatshirts for -10 degrees;  thinking that it will be freezing cold all day long AND the air temp multiplies at a much faster rate than I can calculate.  And four hours later, the temp has risen 70 degrees to reach a whopping 60 degrees.  How is that even possible? 

All I know is (#2) ... is that we are loving the new temps that this week has brought us southern folk.

Part II, Costume Contest!

Continuation from yesterday's post:

We won the Costume Contest!  First Place. 
Prize:  more chicken!! 

I liked living a quiet, unknown, wallflower-kinda, introverted life ... until the 5K/1 Mile run, that is.  I saw a "quote" that was NEW to me.  But, it may NOT be new to you...

But I laughed when I read it, the kind of laughing where you could pee your pants!  Aw, maybe I did - just a little. 

So, based on the quote, I created T-shirts for my husband and me.  Actually the T-shirts are our NEW Halloween Costumes.  For all the extroverted parties we attend!  But since the run came first, I got my adrenaline rushing and my bum in gear to get the T-shirts done before the School Run.  And so this is how we got our new nicknames at my daughters' school:

"SPEEDBUMP" and "FASTLANE" 

(I think my oldest may be embarrassed by us, but I'm not sure, she doesn't seem to acknowledge us in public any longer.  Because when we walked into Church to attend the evening Mass and some unknown person in the pew across the way greeted us with "HEY, it's SPEEDBUMP and FASTLANE!!" our eldest went to the restroom and returned to sit with a new and different family.)

the quote: 

My T-shirt:  FASTLANE

My husband's T-shirt:  SPEEDBUMP

The backside of FASTLANE T-shirt was changed to accomodate the run; live was replaced by run.

The backside of SPEEDBUMP announces... "AND PROUD OF IT" 

PS  The running adults got a big laugh out of it.  Especially the "MOMS".  

PPS  I am so not doggin' my husband!  He thinks the quote is funny too... maybe not "pee your pants" funny, but "chuckle, chuckle" funny.  And he is used to my sense of humor by now.

PPPS  My husband is actually a FASTLANE kind of RUNNER with a sub 2:46 Marathon time.  Yup, that's right, I can brag about my husband running 26.2 miles in less than three hours.  Because I think his marathon time is approximately my HALF marathon time.   And I am proud of his running talent. 

PPPPS  To all my neighbors, yes, that was ME on the ground taking photos of speedbumps.  I apologize to those of you who did NOT know what I was doing lying in the middle of the street.  I am not upset at the phonecalls to the police.  But I did have a difficult time explaining myself. 

PPPPPS  Halloween costumes will be for sale soon!

recaps of the last six weeks

Brother Mark and his family; wife - Andrea, Adam, Katie, and Joshua

15.  Visitors!

More family from Michigan ventures to Texas to experience the daily 107 degrees firsthand.  Surely, they wouldn't believe it without FEELING it for themselves!!

Plus, they wanted to test their antibodies and immunity against our contagious flu/virus. 

They survived!  The only "thing" they caught was dehydration!

We had so much fun together ... even in the midst of being ill ... laughter resulted in coughing fits.  But we managed to just have fun!

recaps of the last six weeks



My mother with the three girls at the Drive-In


6.  I.Love.This.Place

It is For Sale.  Somebody please buy it and keep it open.  Besides, who EVER gets an opportunity to buy a Drive-In?  Please, don't turn it into yet another vacant strip mall!!

Recently, we took the girls to the Drive-In.  A real Drive-In.  We were an obvious group of drive-in newbies. 

Or would it be:  Drive-in virgins? 

Yes, virgins, because our backseat was being used to hold carseats, coolers, outdoor chairs, and blankets.  Joking aside, we were definitely the ONLY other vehicle that had never been to the drive-in before.  All the other vehicles (except that other one) parked backwards.  And most vehicles were PICK-UPS.  We are definitely in TEXAS. 

Now Showing:
Toy Story 3 and Shrek Forever After

We parked near the concession stand and restrooms... because with little kids... that is where we needed to be.  Plus the concession stand had speakers (and FOOD).  I wanted to listen to the movie without turning on the car because with my luck, the car battery would die.  Unfortunately, the original drive-in speakers at each car park were long gone - just don't "hit" the posts that still exist. 

Although we came prepared with snacks, popcorn and bubbles at the drive-in was necessary!

Luckily, we weren't in the vehicle that had to be jumped - only one car battery died that evening. 

While the children watched the movie, ran around outside, and climbed from backseat to middleseat to front seat, I proposed buying a Pick-Up to my husband.  A Pick-Up for all our future Drive-In evenings.  He rolled his eyes while I dreamily crooned, "a pick-up for the drive-in; a pick-up for a haulin'; a pick-up for drivin' (get it?); a pick-up for..." and he didn't let me finish!

Since that didn't fly...

I proposed buying a "weekend home" so that we could frequent the Drive-In and the quaint town on weekends.  And you know what he said... "NO"!  Actually it was shouted.  And I quote verbatim, "YOU WANT TO PURCHASE A WEEKEND HOME THAT IS 25 MINUTES FROM OUR CURRENT HOME?"

"Why Not?" I ask.

"BECAUSE WE ARE ONLY 25 MINUTES FROM OUR FRONT DOOR... IT TAKES LONGER TO GET TO DALLAS... AND WE ARE NOT GOING TO DRIVE 25 MINUTES TO SPEND THE WEEKEND AWAY FROM HOME.  GO SPEND THE WEEKEND AT "L's" HOUSE.  THEY LIVE 20 MINUTES AWAY."

Since that didn't fly...

I offered a new suggestion, "Let's buy a weekend home in Dallas, then!"

PS  I think "he's" upset with me -- he has stopped talking -- and probably that includes listening!
PPS  I didn't even think about proposing to BUY the Drive-In... I think I'll do that tonight.  I'll let you know how that goes!  :+)

cynicism: the new alligator

This new alligator is sewn on the left breast of (almost) every shirt I own and wear.  The alligator is deceiving because it appears to be the real Lacoste.  But this special "cynicgator" has its big tongue sticking out and it's pointing at everyone I pass.   Especially if I happen to point my left breast in your direction. 

Sarcasm goes hand-in-hand.

So, I ran into ... "Joe the Happy Guy and his equally dysfunctional fungus-like Wife".  We, meaning the entire small big town in which we reside, all know they are full of shit -- quite up their eyebrows.  They put on airs of happiness for their own benefit, I suppose.  Because ... really who talks like that???  Nobody I really know.  Only the SURFACE types!?

"HI.  How are you?  (They approached and inquired, not really meaning the question, but using it out of fake courtesy)"

"Ahhh... (before I am cut-off/interrupted)"

"We ARE GREAT.  I mean REALLY FANTASTIC.  LIFE is so GOOD.  I can't BELIEVE how GREAT life is and how GREAT we are doing.  Everything is so GREAT."

"Oh, that's... (before I am chopped off again and wondering who asked how they were doing?)"

"We have ONE child and she is BRILLIANT, FANTASTIC, GREAT, EXCEPTIONAL.  YOU just don't know how GREAT it is to be a PARENT or to have a CHILD."

"No, I .... (cut-off again and still wondering who asked?)"

"I mean, isn't it GREAT how life turns out so PERFECTLY?  We are SO SO HAPPY !!!"

"Well, nice to see you both again, I do hope you sell your FORECLOSED home, FIND a JOB, and child A gets accepted into the MAINSTREAM program at school!" 

(because this IS small town knowledge and I walk off with a GIANT smile :+)

Because who really talks this way?
And IF they do really talk this way, is it true?
Do you believe them?
Who are they posturing for?
Who are they kidding?
Six positive adjectives in one fast breath, are they serious?
I have a tiny bit of guilt for not believing them, but do you believe them?
Haven't they learned that it is better to say nothing at all than to drivel in 'imposter' greatness?
Do you have a headache, too???
One compound word:  GASBAG!
Please get me a Tylenol.  Or three.  Or an imposter daquiri.

a 4th recap

patriotic painting, parades, pirate's booty (candy loot), sparklers, glowrings, snakes, and fireworks!

lemons sometimes don't make lemonade

You know when you are going to have "one of those days" when ...

the day begins in the wrong direction:

* like when one child SPRAINS an ankle and the morning is spent waiting for XRAYS

* like another child is diagnosed with RINGWORM

* and yet another child is diagnosed with FIFTHs DISEASE

* so who will take care of the 5th DISEASE'd child because a Pregnant Woman should not be in their company ??

* the dog vomitted GRASS and CAKE at the back door and front door

* a cat brought in, yet, another SNAKE

* the washing machine smells vile

* the compost pile is molding

* Mommy NEEDS a NAP!!

cats for sale

actually, you would return them because they are on the high maintenance end of felineness.  and I would not put any unsuspecting victim through the rigamarole that we endure on a daily basis --

so,

cats for rental ...

guaranteed to catch any critter that needs capturing in your home or yard

guaranteed to eat uninvited insects

guaranteed to be low maintenance for a short amount of time

guaranteed to perform properly and adequately

guaranteed to return to our home

ps... don't let their adoring furry feline faces deceive you

pps... the tennis ball is for me.  and parking.  and a guarantee that I stop. 

6.2.8

A photo recap of my baby's 2nd birthday party.  I love decorating and celebrating for birthdays and holidays.  I am passing on that love to my girls.  Because darling daughter #1 took it upon herself to design, create and decorate for her little sister.  Now that is "Sister Love" !  At least for the first 12 hours of the day, because by 8:00 pm they were very "tired" ... probably, of each other. 

the tooth fairy

I forgot that the "tooth fairy" needed to visit our home last night.  I inadvertently locked her out.  She had no access to our home.  Therefore, no money!  And the "tooth fairy's helper" was unavailable to aide in the delivery as well.  I am not sure what "his" excuse was!

Victoria lost a tooth... a long-awaited tooth.  The tooth fell out at 7:16 am.  And by the time 8:45 pm rolled around, we had long forgotten about the tooth.  Or at least, I had forgotten about the tooth.  A lot of action had occurred in the thirteen and one-half hours between lost tooth and bed time. 

Victoria placed her tooth fairy doll next to her pillow which held her tooth safe and sound.  All the tooth fairy had to do was replace the tooth with a gold dollar coin.  Easy, right??  Well tooth fairy fell into a deep slumber and never woke up.   Victoria was up by 6:00 am to seek her treasure. 

Only too bad for me and the tooth fairy.

Victoria was elated.  Excited.  Jubilation rang out from her pepto-bismol pink sanctuary:

"I GET DOUBLE!  THE TOOTH FAIRY FORGOT TO COME!  IT'S MY LUCKY DAY!"

Because we all know that when the tooth fairy has a momentary memory lapse or a very busy flight night, the toothless child gets double.  It's a rule.  At least it is a rule in this home.  And there are no unhappy tears as a result!

Tooth Fairy holder doll is from North American Bear Company.  Pink, Lavendar, and Yellow.  Girl pirate also available.

Tooth holders for boys from North American Bear Company:  Pirates!  Baseball player!  Super Tooth Hero!

Check out:   http://www.nabearstore.com/

Click on Dolls.

Click on Toothy Treasures.

These tooth holders are ADORABLE KEEPSAKES. 

just like heaven

1001 places to go before you die:

1.  MACKINAC ISLAND

Mackinac Island (pronounced mack-ih-naw) should definitely be at the top of everyone's list.  Or, at the top IF you reside in Michigan and neighboring states of Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, Minnesota.  Logistically, a trip from Seattle would make it more difficult... although, worth the time travel. 

http://www.mackinacisland.org/

The island is small enough to run around -- even for an amateur, slow runner like me.  The island is perfect for biking around.  Rent a tandem and a honey and pedal through beautiful scenery... while laughing!!   Ride a horse.  Beware of the SMELL emitted from these island creatures -- it is a small island!

The no motorized vehicle ordinance makes this island very safe... unless you kicked in the head by one of the many horses in town.  And I don't think you can receive a 'ticket' for drunk-walking on the way home from a pub. 

The Grand Hotel ... as seen in the movie "Somewhere in Time"... is a lovely place to stay.  Share a special moment with your daughters, mothers, grandmothers, sisters, or aunts during Afternoon Tea at the Grand Hotel.

I am dreaming of a vacation on Mackinac Island!

A great place to visit

If you ever get the chance to go to Missouri

Take it from me, go in a hurry

You'll have fun at the top of the arch

Quench your thirst before you parch

at any quaint pub or chain restaurant you desire

go to the "City Museum" for a dire

dose of family fun!

A great place to bring the whole family!

I highly recommend a weekend visit to St. Louis
(unless your in-laws reside there)!

http://www.citymuseum.org/

http://www.explorestlouis.com/

three-story recycled slide at the City Museum

6:43 AM

"YES, I know how to operate those silly child-proof latches!  Mom, Dad!  The latches do NOT work!  I know it is a bit early this morning.  But I am trying to find the waffle mix, I am hungry!  Oh, AND I was just trying to help.  xoxo"