Tuesday, March 9, 2010

in denial ...

Reclining in room number 5 of my OB's clinic.  I am admiring the blank monitor as it reads my name and birthdate and baby's estimated due date when the ultrasound tech enters room 5. 

She begins to prep me for my ultrasound to (a.) determine gender and (b.) verify that the baby is healthy.

Ultrasound tech begins to move the wand over my belly, "abracadabra, show me a sign".  "Abracadabra, baby move your legs".

The brain looks great.  The heart is beating at 147 bpm.  There are four chambers, whew.  The spine is good.  The flesh at the base of the neck is in proportion.  Baby is cooperating.  The wand magically sweeps below the bottom and ...
I shout, "IT's A BoY!"

The ultrasound tech did not acknowledge my shout, so I did it again, "IT's A BoY!" 

She responded this time, "Actually, that is the umbilical cord."

You know, I have had so many ultrasounds in all my pregnancies that I clearly knew how to read one.  So I asked her to show me again.  And again.  And again. 

Exasperated, she finally went to get the Doctor.  The real ultrasound reading professional.

Doctor entered the room and waved the magic wand over my belly and declared, "Please give my condolences to your husband.  No single household should have that much estrogen under one roof." 

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